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| OPEN: JANUS FILE #0331
Today is Veteran's Day. If by any chance there are any members or veterans of the US military reading this, whatever branch you served, I hope that you are being given the respect and honor that you so truly deserve.
Yesterday at work, I had one customer who was wearing a baseball cap indicating that he was retired Army. Since I didn't have anyone waiting in line behind him, after ringing up his purchases, I asked him what he had done when he was in the Army. He gave me a brief rundown of his career. I'm pretty certain that he was at least a 20-year man, because he said that he retired as a master sergeant.
He told me that he had started as a cook, then after a couple of years, he had gone into chemical warfare.
Never one to resist anything resembling a straight line, I interjected, "Are you sure you didn't get your start in chemical warfare while you were a cook?"
Fortunately for me, the retired sergeant found my comment as funny as I did. And after he gave me a brief history of his Army career, I made sure to wish him a Happy Veteran's Day as he was walking out the door.
And as I said (or at least implied) at the beginning, Happy Veteran's Day to all members of the US military, past and present.
CLOSE: JANUS FILE #0331 | | |
| OPEN: JANUS FILE #0330
Remember my last entry, where I was all ecstatic about getting my laptop back? I think I may have spoken too soon, because it is down again.
As I said, I had taken my laptop to Computer Outlet (a local computer store) after I began having problems with it. Problems as in, I would try to turn it on, but nothing would happen. No power at all. The technician took it apart, cleaned it out, and put it back together, and according to the invoice, it started booting up normally, so he didn't do anything else.
As I said, I picked up the laptop on Thursday. It worked great Thursday, Friday, and Saturday.
Then came yesterday. I went to Heine Brothers after getting the Sunday paper, and prepared to enjoy the paper, the Internet, and a cup of hot Orange Spice tea. I took the laptop out of my backpack, flipped it open, and hit the power button.
Nothing happened.
I tried checking the AC adapter, and switched the batteries. Still nothing.
This is the second time this has happened. When I first began having power problems with the laptop in September (It would only work with the adapter, and not just on battery power), I took it to Office Depot. They ran some diagnostics on it, and for some reason, it was working again -- but only for a few days. It was after Grant was unable to determine the cause that I took it to Computer Outlet, and they seemingly got things working -- but again, only for a few days.
The laptop's up, it's down. It's up, it's down.
I'm beginning to think that my laptop has decided that it's part yoyo.
CLOSE: JANUS FILE #0330 | | |
| OPEN: JANUS FILE #0329
I was in a pretty good mood yesterday. Early last month, my laptop started giving me problems. Problems as in, it wouldn't power up when I tried to turn it on. And when my friend Grant (who is an alpha geek's alpha geek) couldn't determine the problem, I had to resort to a repair shop (one that Grant highly recommended).
Yesterday, I got it back. The technician wasn't sure what the problem was. After dismantling my laptop, cleaning it with air (yes, my laptop was given a blowjob), and reassembling it, it booted up normally. The best explanation I was given was that there was a loose connection somewhere, and that was corrected in the reassembling. I also upgraded the RAM, and now it runs a little faster.
As you might well imagine, I was ecstatic. To celebrate, I went to Heine Brothers Coffee. Free wi-fi . . . and they have a pretty good selection of tea, too. I got a cup of hot Orange Spice tea, booted up my laptop, and sat back to enjoy several hours roaming the wilds of the Internet.
I had been happily hitting a few sites which I had been unable to visit for a few weeks (you never know what site will come afoul of the library's blocking software, and for what reason) when the CD the staff had been playing suddenly stopped. A few moments later, a guy introduced himself, and began playing the guitar and singing.
I had known that some of the Heine Brothers locations had live music at various times. This was the first time I had ever been present when they hosted a musician.
It wouldn't have been bad if the guitarist had been playing acoustic guitar. Unfortunately, his guitar was hooked up to an amp. And while I don't think his amp went all the way to 11, it definitely went to 10.1, because it was quite a bit louder than it needed to be. If I had been trying to listen to anything on the Internet, the music would have drowned it out. I even had my earphones in, but all they could do was mute the sound a little.
At one point, part of me wanted to ask the guitarist if he was taking requests. I was visualizing him saying yes, to which I would reply, "Stop playing." (All right, that probably would have been a little mean. But as I think I have said before, I really am a mean and despicable person.)
Finally, the guitarist came to the end of his first set as I was getting ready to catch the bus home. His last song was one I recognized -- Johnny Cash's "Folsom Prison Blues." I thought he was finished with the set, so the One Last Song irked me just a little. When he came to the line about shooting a man in Reno just to watch him die, I really wanted to say, "And I want to shoot a man in Louisville, just to shut him up."
I didn't, though. As I said, I was on my way out, and I figured everyone else could do without my criticism.
CLOSE: JANUS FILE #0329 | | |
| OPEN: JANUS FILE #0328
Last night, I was making my way back home after work. I was waiting at the Highlands Kroger for the #23-Hikes/Hurstbourne run. It was raining, and I was hoping that the bike rack would be empty. All too often, I am faced with bikes in both slots of the bike rack, and I have to hope that the driver will have enough basic decency to let me bring the bike on the bus, especially since I was waiting for the last run for that route for the night. (I think most of TARC's drivers are fairly decent, but there are more than a few pricks who take the attitude of "It's not my problem.")
Fortunately, when the bus finally pulled up to the stop, there was only one bike in the rack. Breathing a sigh of relief, I put my bike in the rack, then boarded the bus.
After I got on the bus, I became aware of another rider, who was talking rather loudly. Much louder than he needed to be. From the way he was slurring his words, I initially got the impression that he was deaf. But after a few more minutes, I realized that no, he wasn't deaf, he was just drunk. Drunk enough that he could have been picked up on public intoxication.
The drunk was talking to a woman seated across the aisle from him, and probably annoying her more than just a little. I'm not sure when it happened, but she started messing with his mind. (Quite easy to do, given his level of inebriation.) She started telling the drunk that she was an undercover cop, and that she was going to have him locked up. No, she wasn't a cop. If she were, she would have just slapped the cuffs on him and called for a cruiser to pick up the drunk. But this guy was so far gone that I think he was believing her story. And everyone else on the bus was more than a little amused at how she was screwing with his mind
As the bus turned on to Goldsmith Lane, another passenger signaled for the bus to stop. As the bus stopped in front of Dairy Queen, the lady told the drunk that there was a girl outside that was calling for him. I realized that at this point, she had gotten tired of playing with the drunk, and was trying to get rid of him. I can't say that I blame her; he was starting to get a little annoying at that point.
Just as the drunk seemed to have boght the woman's story about being an undercover cop, he also bought her story about a girl calling for him. But when he stood up, his pants fell to his ankles. Okay, I have seen more than my fair share of guys thinking that it is cool to wear their pants with the waistband hanging as low as possible. And I have even seen one or two whose pants seemed to be ready to succumb to the forces of gravity. But this is the first time I have ever seen some idiot's saggy pants actually fall all the way to the ground. And you know what? It was funny. I didn't laugh out loud (at least not at that moment), but I was silently chuckling. I think most of the other passengers were doing the same.
Well, the drunk managed to pull his pants up, and he staggered out the door toward the Dairy Queen. As soon as he was off the bus, the woman urged the driver to hit the gas. The driver did, but only briefly. The woman realized that the drunk had left his duffel bag on the bus, and she had the driver stop long enough for her to drop the bag on the sidewalk where the drunk could retrieve it. The driver then quickly put the bus back in gear.
Once the drunk was safely off the bus, everyone began laughing. I even applauded the lady. Some people might find that a little cruel, but if you're going to get yourself that falling-down drunk, you probably deserve any derision thrown your way.
I was still laughing when when the bus pulled up to my stop across the street from my condo a few minutes later.
CLOSE: JANUS FILE #0328 | | |
| OPEN: JANUS FILE #0327
I've been in mourning for the the past few days. Last Thursday, Soupy Sales died.
Yeah, yeah, I know what some of you are thinking right now -- Who?
Soupy Sales was (among other things) a comedian, kids TV show host, and jazz afficianado. His style of comedy was slapstick, and he was probably best known for getting a pie in the face at the end of most of his jokes. According to his entry on Wikipedia, Sales claimed that he was on the receiving end of some 20,000 pies during his career.
I don't think I ever saw his kids show (other than clips on other shows), but I get the distinct impression that he was something of the anti-Mr. Rogers. By that, I mean that Mr. Rogers and Captain Kangaroo were the kids shows that parents wanted their kids to watch. Soupy Sales was the show that parents would rather you not watch -- but you did anyway.
From everything I have heard about Soupy, the funniest thing he did happened on January 1, 1965. Even though it was a holiday, Soupy had to do his TV show that day, and he was apparently just a little upset at having to do so. At the end of his broadcast, he told all his young viewers to go to their (presumably still sleeping) fathers' wallets, take out all the funny green pictures of Abraham Lincoln that they could find, and mail those pictures to him. "And I'll send you a postcard from Puerto Rico!" Apparently, there were some kids who followed those instructions, and there were some people who were less than amused at this stunt. (I can't imagine why.)
[Hmmm, there's an idea for vacation financing. Maybe I should ask anyone reading this to send me all the green and purple pictures of Abraham Lincoln that they have in their wallet, and I'll send them a postcard from next year's NASFIC in Raleigh.]
So long, Soupy, and thanks for all the pies.
CLOSE: JANUS FILE #0327 | | |
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